Yesterday I wrote about how we were considering new sleeping arrangements for the Birdie. Well, after some discussion within the house and some very thoughtful comments on my post, we decided to go ahead and move the crib into Birdie's room. It was very helpful to me to hear from other moms that Birdie would be just fine in her own room, and she was.
We moved the crib last evening to our other bedroom. This room is just down the hall from ours. When you're lying in our bed you can easily see into the nursery and into the crib. As DH put it so emphatically, "She's less than fifty feet away!" Birdie went to bed just like normal at 9 p.m. and slept just fine until her first nursing at 12:30. I went and got her, we nursed, and fell asleep for a little while. Sometime around 1:30 I went and put her back in her crib. While I enjoy snuggling with Birdie, I just don't sleep as well with her right next to me as I do when she's in her own bed. That's why we had the crib next to us. It was the best of both worlds. Baby woke up again around 2:30 as is her way and I brought her back into the bed. This time I just left her there. As a result, neither one of us got a whole lot of sleep. I was always repositioning so that I wouldn't squish her. All of my rustling around would annoy her and she'd give me *the look*. We gave up around 6 a.m. and just got up.
For our first night with baby out of the bedroom, I would give the whole experience a "C." It wasn't a total failure. There were no tears. DH and I had some nice alone time where we didn't have to worry about little eyeballs. Birdie didn't seem to mind going to sleep in her own room at all. She stirred a couple of times but in all instances she went right back to sleep.
On the other side, moving her into her own room actually increased the amount of time she spent in our bed. Prior to the move she would only be in our bed long enough to nurse and then I'd put her back in her crib because it was right there. Having her next to me most of the night reduced both our hours of sleep, the quality of our sleep, and my time snuggling with DH. I'm willing to give this new situation a try, but we need to make some improvements on the system. On my other post, one mother, (who writes her own awesome blog) suggested a second crib, or a mattress on the floor. I'm thinking the second crib idea is where we're going to go. That way, Birdie can go to sleep in her own room and then, when she comes in to nurse, I can just put her in a crib in the old arrangement. Theoretically, as she sleeps longer she will eventually transition into sleeping all night in her own room. It will be the best of all three worlds! We're going to keep things as they are for a little while. We'll do another try at our sleeping arrangements tonite. We're going to find a second crib and go forward. I want to thank everyone who commented on the original post, you ladies are *wunnerful*
Trial and error is the best way to find out, I think. Although it's not an error, but you know what I mean.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I've noticed over the years... some partners think that once the needy, needy newborn days are over, things will go back to normal. I actually thought that, too, sort of. I have no idea if that's the "new dad syndrome" you were talking about, but I seem to hear it all the time! I've never heard it called that. It's kind of a new parent thing.
It's almost like there's a secondary wave of acceptance that comes around 5.5 or six months. Even with the second baby, I felt this shift. The babies are less dependent and I got this, "ok, now what?" feeling.
I don't know if I'm making any sense. Regarding the sleeping, I'm sure you'll find a system that works. Be ready for it to totally change every few months, too. You'd laugh if I told you all of the places my first kid slept!
I think I'd choose the twin mattress on the floor over the crib for a few reasons:
ReplyDelete1) you already have a crib for the first bedtime, naps, etc, so this will be just for middle-of-the-night
2) it's much easier to lie on the twin mattress and nurse htem back down, then slip away quietly to your own bed. I find I'm much less tired if I can nurse lying down at night, than if i have to sit up and nurse them
3) you won't ever have to do an official transition from the crib to the "big bed" since she'll be used to sleeping in either one
The only disadvantage is that the twin mattress doesn't "contain" an active baby, but since it's only for middle-of-the-night, it's not too much of an issue.
Either one would work fine, though, I am sure.